Tuesday, February 2, 2010

How Much Wood Can a Woodchuck Chuck?

I know that I haven't said much lately, but given that today is 'Groundhog's Day', I could keep quiet no longer!

Do we have a parrot day? A macaw day? A love your parrot parade? Does Hallmark set aside a special day, create cards, and encourage folks to buy expensive nuts and toys for their beloved companions?

Of course you see my point.... and yet, the silly groundhog gets its own day? That's just crazy tawk!

Regardless, in honor of Groundhog's day, I have decided to ignore the groundhog (easy enough), and address the woodchuck. Stick with me... I have a plan here...
The groundhog has already received entirely too much attention.

Forget about how much wood can a woodchuck chuck... what about the chucking ability of a beautiful (and humble) parrot such as myself? Let the woodchucks and beavers step forward... I can give any of them a run for their money!

Therefore, I spit on groundhogs, woodchucks and other lower species of animals such as common dogs (Barney comes to mind).

Tell me, does Barney ever do anything besides sleep? I truly don't get the fuss over this mottled mess of fur... Can he say the simplest of things such as 'hello' or 'pretty bird'?

Yeah- um, no he cannot. He cannot say one simple word. Clearly, he is lazy - and I have proof!!!!

But, I wanted to write to tell you about the most wonderful day I had yesterday! And, this ties into my woodchuck theme.

My dad graciously entertained me for quite some time by replacing the steps on the ladder down to my lower area. And just when they were nice and round! I'd been working on those things for months, and nearly had the screws exposed!

Hah! Joke was on him, though!

He wasn't even out of the room before I went over there and took a hunk out of the first rung, and the second, and the third.... all the way down....

I detest square edges... Why does he not get that? The male human is so, um, inexplicably dense....

So all you woodchucks, beavers and even groundhogs (do they chew wood?) pay close attention! This is how a parrot properly chucks wood!

Notice that even the perch I am sitting on 'used' to be square... hah!

And, I've only just begun! So much wood to chew, so little time (between screams, foraging, and looking pretty!)



Coco said...

Wow! It always gets me how strong their beaks can be. My mom's got a mini macaw and whenever I visit and take a look at the destruction she wreaks on her toys, I'm so impressed. Even when Charles is going at his bird kabob at full strength he's just barely shredding some soft wood, hehe.

Coco is sooo gorgeous by the way :)

louara said...

Gracie-Mae agrees with you 100% Coco! "at holiday time i would like to give a greeting card to louara and all they have is merry xmas from the family dog or cat! i have to scratch out the word dog/cat and replace it with bird! why can't they make a greeting card from the family bird for goodness sakes-we should start our own business Coco-we could be rich!-gracie-mae

Her chewing skills are quite impressive Robin. You should give her a big block and see what she could sculpt for you.

Arlene said...

Coco you just gave me an idea for a greeting card business. No humans allowed except to lick the stamp.

Robin it looks like you have a budding artist there.
Like Louara said, give her a big block of wood and let her artistic juices flow.

Imagine if her beak can do that what they can do to a finger. EEK!

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